Update on bad news

Well...he didn't wake up. I was told he passed away this morning and the family is donating some of his organs.

Yesterday around 1:30pm I received a call. The doctor had declared him brain dead and moving him out from the ICU. And the family had to decide whether to remove him from the machine. I said to my friend, "miracles do happen, right?"..."Maybe he will wake up."

I had intended to visit him after work that day. But with such news, I wasn't sure if I should wait. I asked permission from my boss to visit him. I needed to bring a colleague with me. I somehow wasn't sure I could do this alone. Thank God..boss understood and agreed. I left office at 2:30pm. So many things crossed my mind while I was driving.

Steven is not a very close friend of mind. And yet to say that we aren't close at all is also not true. We would stay out of touch for months at times. We hardly meet. But each time when he calls, he would tease me and make me burst into laughters.

I remembered when my dad was so sick and admitted to Selayang Hospital. I was there to look after my dad. He came and gave me moral support. He accompanied me to lunch. When he left, the specialist broke the family some bad news. The doctor had told us to bring my dad home. I was completely broken. And I called him. He was the one who advised me on what to do next. He was the one who gave me the moral support.

Yesterday, I would say was one of the worst days in my entire life. I got to the hospital and saw him surrounded by his family members. They were all crying. His ex-partner who was there told me that the family has decided to remove him from the machine but he was reluctant to go. I was dumbstruck....."You mean Steven said he refuse to go?" The guy said no. Steven is brain dead. He is communicating through a medium. Then only I realised there was a medium seated next to him.

His sisters and mother were all crying. Even my colleague who went with me, who knew not of this man also could not contain her tears. Her sister asked if he is willing to donate his organs to which he agreed. And the family kept persuading him to let go.....they assured him that all will be well taken care. The siblings said they will look after their mom.

Steven is not married but has 2 daughters aged 8 & 4 with a woman. The "wife" was there. She promised to look after their children. She said.."I know these are the 2 whom you loved the most. Don't worry I will take good care of them". With that the "wife" went out to the waiting area and brought the 2 girls. She told them to hug Daddy and to call Daddy.

Then she served tea to his motherwhich usually in a Chinese tradition, it means accepting the person into the family. In this case it is considered she has been accepted as a daughter in-law by the family. Her sister was telling him what has just taken place.

Then the medium speaks again. The medium said not everyone is here. There are a few more people which he wanted to see and he named them. I waited for a while more and then I walked to him and spoke a few word to him. I stroke his arm and it still felt warm. Then I left.

It was and still is very devastating to me. I wished I had stayed longer. I wished I had said more things to him. I just cannot believe he is gone.

Rest In Peace, Steven. May God bless your soul. Amitabha.