Down, down and down

Life has not been good to me lately.

I hate going home. I hate stepping into the kitchen especially. Everyday I see the incomplete kitchen, I get so mad. So frustrating I just didn't know what to do. It does look like the contractor is never going to finish the job despite having taken the money.

Who would want to finish the work now that the money has been paid. Only a fool would pay up before the job is completed and that fool is none other than ME.

I blamed myself for listening to my mother. My mother kept telling me the old man will not cheat us. So I trusted her and I paid. And look at the mess I got myself into.

Already stressed with the contractors, suddenly business picked up and I am overloaded with assignments. So many until I began to have sleepless nights. I think and think of where to find "heads". Been working late daily as well.

With all the worry and stress, I am now rewarded with gastritis. It was bearable until a few days ago, I had to take sick leave. I puked. I felt my stomach filled with gas and acid. Then the pain. Then the bloatedness. Then the hunger pang but after eating 2 mouthful, I felt so full but then an hour later I am hungry again but I could only take another 2 mouthful. And for the past 2 days, my stomach has been churning.

Oh...not to forget during my sick leave I was working from home. Not that I liked to do it. Boss was on the phone with me talking about work and I had to get things done.

I am not happy at all. I'm still having gastritis. Medication has not been of much help. How can I get the contractors to finish the job? I paid him out of sympathy. He has a sick wife whom I have met. His eldest son is utterly useless. He is an old man in his 60s. I feel for him when I see him climb the ladder to nail the wood and so on. I wished he didn't have to work so hard anymore at his age. For these facts, I am being taken advantage of.

It is an expensive lesson. Never be kind anymore. Never have a soft heart anymore. Never trust anyone, not even your own mother.

Life sucks.